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How can I develop healthy boundaries?

By On Monday, October 10th, 2016 Categories : Question & Answer

How can I develop healthy boundaries?. Do You mam own that kind of problem?, If do then plz found the best tips below:

One way or another, we are all held back by what we believe to be true. We are stuck in the mire of the things we tell ourselves.

To discover why we are stuck, we have to look underneath what we think is the culprit.

And then look underneath again.

What gets us stuck is usually hidden under a belief system that we have always accepted as truth and has therefore become invisible to us.

You need an example, so here it is.

I might say “Giving my friends everything makes me generous and good. I always give my friends everything, and then everyone takes advantage of me. What a cruel world.”

I believe that what gets me stuck is that the world is a cruel place.

I need look underneath that. If “everyone is taking advantage of my generosity” maybe my generosity is something to review.

(Besides, we have no control over the world; but we can adjust ourselves.)

It’s hard for me to review my generosity. I believe not being generous makes me selfish.

This belief has me stuck.

I need to turn the belief around, because believing this is tangling my relationships and leaving me unhappy and resentful.

My own belief is not working in my favor.

It’s important to be generous. Maybe I have to begin by being generous with myself.

This is not selfish: this is the definition of a healthy boundary.

But I can’t. I can’t let go of giving others everything.


Because I believe I am not good enough.

If I stop bending to everyone’s wishes and whims they will leave me.

Hence I need to begin by believing I am worthy of being loved.

That if I respect myself, those around me will love me anyway, and that if they don’t I need to find people who love me for who I am and not because I do everything for them.

Healthier boundaries both create and attract healthy relationships.

I surround myself with people who respect me and understand I am generous and can give what is reasonable and what doesn’t compromise me.

Look at the things you believe in that are making you suffer. Turn them every which way. Put them back where they belong.

Set yourself free.

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